Flipping Out

Pitchers and catchers don’t report for another month, and most Baltimore baseball fans probably wouldn’t mind if they didn’t report at all. The NBA and NHL register just below the Lady Terps when it comes to Charm City sports stories (15,000 for a women’s hoops game?). The Daytona 500 is still a few weeks away. The Australian Open is taking place, well, in Australia. And when is the last time you met your friends at the bar to watch Nadal vs. Federer anyway? So with more than two months to the NFL Combine and the Ravens knee deep in the search for a new head coach, Baltimore sports fans are about to flip out. Or at least flip flop. Consider the following streams of consciousness that may or may not represent the subconscious of RavensNation.

Event 1. Jason Garrett arrives in Baltimore on Monday Night
Rejoice. Our savoir. Did you see what he did with Tony Romo? He’s an offensive genius. He went to Princeton - so smart. Like Russell Crowe in A Beautiful Mind, he’s going to draw up plays on the boardroom windows in Owings Mills so the players on the practice field can see what he’s thinking. How great is it that the Cowboys lost. Now we can sign our coach this week. Cam Cameron? Remember San Diego in 2006! Dom Capers? Sure. Fans will start dyeing their hair red. “Brian without the Brain” t-shirts will pop up all over town. Let’s go Garrett!

Event 2. Jason Garrett leaves Baltimore Tuesday Night
Revolt. A sinner. Did you see what Tony Romo did last weekend? He’s only been an offensive coordinator for one year. He went to Princeton - to play football. Like Russell Crowe in A Beautiful Mind, he’s going to make fans mutter to themselves and throw their furniture out the window. If only the Giants lost, we could be interviewing Steve Spagnuolo this week. Cam Cameron? Remember Miami in 2007! Dom Capers? Unsure. Fans will start pulling their hair out. “Brian, where have you gone?” t-shirts will pop up all over town. Go home Garrett!

So which argument will stick? It all depends on how Jason Garrett and the Ravens brain trust handle the next few days. Garrett will either be endeared or despised by Baltimoreans. And as Ravens fans wait for the other shoe to drop, you can be certain that once the decision is made, there will be no flip-flops; we either fit him for a glass slipper or give him the boot.